Sunday, March 10, 2013

So, tomorrow I'm going to be doing something really stupid and then tweeting about it....


I have a movie mission placed in front of me....

A suicidal one... One that you place yourself in a dark room in the basement of your home to endure...

I will be tweeting while I take on all three Lord of the Rings extended editions... back to back to back...

Clearly, I will not be getting laid for the next week, once I get through this, because I will just be too fucking spaced out to be there, and my already sketch personality will be thrice much as I spout out random Elvish and quote passages from the Simarillion...


My ass will be completely fused with the seat via osmosis.
I will be that weirdo in the near empty screening room between 5:30 p.m. and Odin knows when the hell I will be done watching...

You see, my thing is that I'm a Tolkien fanatic... a severe one in my literature. However, I've never partaken in all of the extended editions in one sitting. I've partaken in the theatrical versions, but that's because I honestly prefer the theatrical films to their extended format. I have enough sense to know when a movie is a movie and a book is a book, even throwing aside my Tolkien fanaticism as a movie critic... The theatrical films have satisfied absolutely enough...
It's kind of why I have a problem with the three-part slashing of The Hobbit, although the movie was satisfying enough...


Being that this is both Spring Break and a lifestyle where I am more preferential to solitude than social activity, it's easy to say I don't have any available friends in the immediate area to undertake this journey. This is a sure sign of being a psychopath just for thinking of going through this hellish celluloid nightmare of Elves, Orcs and greatness in even the smallest of creatures...

All factors point to my needing a psychiatrist to fix up my mental health by the time I finish enduring this massacre of my cranial being.... Follow me on twitter to keep track of my mental deterioration and pinpoint the precise moment when I will stop knowing myself as STinG and begin knowing myself as Strider!

Let's fucking go!

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